As an Event Coordinator, I specialize in all things birthday party, retirement party, corporate functions, expo's, but most of all, weddings. Every weekend we decorate the halls with beautiful linens and decor, calm the brides who are anxious, and prepare for two families to come together on one special day. The kick? Most wedding traditions and romance have disappeared.
I am big on tradition, especially when the heart of the wedding is based on tradition. Now I know that we live in modern times, but weddings are centered around the reception in this day in age. I still remember when my parents got married - I was six years old, and of course, the flower girl. My parents had a beautiful ceremony held in a church (I do remember it taking FOREVER) then we took a bunch of photos and went to a reception hall afterwards. I specifically remember looking at the beautiful cakes and listening to my Aunt deliver the Maid of Honor speech. At some point I was swept away by the sitter and taken upstairs to watch movies with the other kids.
What I remember is the tradition, the love, and how pretty I thought my mom was in her dress. Now that I am helping to plan weddings, my view is much more skewed. Groomsmen are almost passed out before the ceremony, the cakes are shoved off to the side, and the venues crave more flowers and decor. I have put together a list of commonalities that I have seen...have you been to any weddings lately and noticed the same thing?
- Wedding ceremonies used to last longer than 10-15 minutes. That is now the average length of ceremony we see.
- First looks have become the norm. The mystery, surprise, and romance has been lost and the guests are left watching a bride walk down the aisle to a man she already saw one hour earlier!
- Cake cutting was part of the tradition - now it has become something people want to get over with right away that takes a total of five minutes.
- Nowadays, families are spending more on alcohol than decor, flowers, and photography. It has become imperative to have an open bar with only the best liquor available.
- The "grand exit" is lost. After the night ends, the bride and groom get all of their things together, and walk to their car and either head home or to a hotel. Limos and old fashioned cars with cans in the back are a thing of the past.
- Most people think they are 100% organized and prepared but in reality they are missing a lot of details. Who will take care of the centerpieces at the end of the evening? Does your caterer bring cake cutting tools or are you? Once your cake is delivered, who is setting up the cake table? I will do a later post about things not to forget on your big day!
- It is rare that we see string quartets, pianists, a harp, or any other live music played for the ceremony. A playlist on an iPhone is the commonality.
- I have yet to hear the traditional wedding song played when the bride walks dow the aisle!
- Don't expect wedding favors.
- Rice, confetti, rose petals - I loved throwing that at the end of the ceremony - I have yet to see that this season too.
This post may sound cynical but I think I am just more saddened. I have seen my fair share of divorce so in my opinion, a wedding is a very sacred ceremony that should be cherished. I definitely think it should be a celebration - just not completely lost with no tradition. The funny thing is, just about everything listed above is free. Tradition doesn't cost anything!
If you have any other wedding traditions or reasons why you decided to forego something listed above, please share! I would love to hear your thoughts!
, by Taylor Hoffman